I miss drawing. I miss painting. I miss writing horrible angsty poetry in formats no man on earth has ever heard of.

I miss climbing trees and skinning my knees. Literally though, how did I do that so often and now can’t seem to manage a skinned knee even if I threw myself onto a gravel road running as fast as I can with the sole intent of skinning my knee?

I miss the idea of keeping a journal.

I miss back when the idea of having a friend seemed so great but now it’s sorta just whatever.

I miss being excited about projects.

I miss having goals and dreams.

I miss exercising.

I miss my color block wind breaker from elementary school.

I miss structure.

I miss the threat of being beaten across my booty with a belt if I DIDN’T clean up around the house and do my chores.

Anymore I just sorta look around and think: tomorrow.

I miss having a sense of passion and motivation I guess.

How do I get that back?

How do I stop defeating myself?